Family share suicide story in hope of helping others
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THE family of a Black Isle father-of-three who committed suicide have spoken out to try to stop others from going through similar ordeals.
James Mullery (28) took his own life after a battle with anxiety and depression.
Now, his devastated family want to reach out to those affected by suicide and raise awareness of the warning signs.
James’s partner Jodie and his mum Wendy and step-dad Patrick have launched a fundraising campaign and a support group to help others.
Jodie (28) said: "There’s part of me that thinks I don’t want other people knowing my business but at the same time if nobody talks about it, how is it ever going to change?
"Reading this might make one other person go ‘that’s how my partner is’ or ‘that’s how my son is’. It might just open someone’s eyes."
James’s suicide is among several that have occurred on the Black Isle in recent months.
The car salesman, who worked his way up to a management role at Arnold Clark Inverness Motorstore, was mentally ill for months before he died on October 8 last year.
Jodie, who lives at Mackenzie Place in Avoch, with their three children Cooper (5), Oscar (2) and seven-month-old Parker, watched his downward spiral.
She said: "As much as he loved selling cars, the pressure was too much for him. That’s when it started to show.
"He started acting funny. I was wondering why it was taking him so long to get home from work. Eventually after weeks and weeks he burst and said he was having panic attacks going over the Kessock Bridge so he was having to drive the long way round Beauly to get home to the Black Isle. He was embarrassed. He felt like a failure.
"He had worked hard to get his job. In his mind he didn’t want to give it up. But he was signed off work from December until May last year and throughout January time he was horrific.
"He genuinely looked physically ill. He wouldn’t go anywhere without me. He tried so hard, taking his anti-depression medication, he really pushed himself. But I genuinely didn’t know what was going on in his head."
He was prescribed anti-depressants which had good results for several months but things went downhill after his grandfather Bill Penn died in August of kidney failure.
Jodie said: "He was completely inconsolable. I genuinely think that was what pushed him over the edge."
She is part of a fundraising campaign to help raise awareness and cash for Inverness-based suicide prevention charity Mikeysline.
James’s mother Wendy, a 54-year-old private music tutor based at Smithton Free Church, said: "It just needs people to start coming forward. At first I thought I could never do anything like this but now, five months on, I’m thinking I can’t let this happen to another family.
"I know every parent is going to say the same thing but he was kind, charismatic, he was a charmer, he was a typical salesperson, he was the one everyone wanted at a party.
"And what he’s left behind is devastation and three children who are going to grow up without their dad. It’s never going to be the same."
James’s Support Group is open to anyone affected by bereavement or who is supporting someone who is suicidal. The first meeting is at the Spectrum Centre in Inverness on April 14 from 11am to 1pm.
For more information, call 07563 572471.
