Avoid home studies strife
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Struggling to get the kids to do schoolwork during lockdown – especially when exams have been cancelled?
Here, Dr Helen Bilton, Professor of Outdoor Learning at Reading University’s Institute of Education, offers advice and tips to help parents and young people come to terms with the ‘new normal’ without an almighty row.
She recommends avoiding conversations when emotions are running high.
“It’s easy to get caught and want to have your say, but really, don’t. If anyone is in the emotional zone, nothing is going to get solved. Every bone in your body will be wanting to have its say, but walk away.”
While exams may have been cancelled, the preparation for the next stage of study is still significant.
“Perhaps instead of enforcing a work pattern that doesn’t appear to have a finishing point, you can work together to agree a future target and work towards that,” says Dr Bilton.
“So acknowledge your child’s frustration. Listen to what they say, don’t try and fix it, just acknowledge their feelings. Then ask their advice, ask them what the solution could be. We’re not far into lockdown, so don’t panic if they don’t do any work. If they’re not used to being asked their view or opinion they may look at you with a furrowed brow, but keep going. Children are really much cleverer than we give them credit for, even two year olds.”
Dr Bilton advises using the language of choice.
“Ask them what the options are for them and what the outcomes of those options might be. Then keep quiet, leave them alone and they’re likely to ponder and consider and make the choice and usually the best one.” Nagging a child to do their homework is also a massive demotivator, especially if they don’t think they can do the work and are scared.
“Someone showing genuine interest in what they’re doing can get them to forget their fear, annoyance, frustration,” she adds.
“Finally, and the most important tip – don’t take it personally. This is the number one thing all teachers must learn, a child reacting isn’t about you, it’s all about them.”
